Futuristic Ice Cream Novel

Lollypop lady gives out lollipops to children of dinosaurs and

illegal immigrants. Rally here, rally here bring your cameras

and smart phones. Please do not SWEAR or smoke. (There are children about)

Moonlight optional, Hi- vis accepted, BBC outside broadcast.




Vegan Matadors

Seals coming ashore
Waves crashing around
Babes guided in
The shoreline brethren
breathe collectively and
rest their weary heads
make the sand their beds
for the night.
Alert to the slightest tremor
from the seas or the sky
or from land tractor
A bird perched upon a fence post
hops down to have a closer look
and sees warm breath mist from hot lungs
and hears sighs and moans grunts and more.
Placebo chipset wired in his brain hums and
uploads images and sound to a satellite receiver
which is then beamed across the globe
A seal rolls over onto its back and claps
sending echoes down the rocky beach
Excited the bird hops closer only to see
headlights approaching from the east.
Car doors slam the sound of rifles cocked
The moon shines on reflecting off seals eyes
as one by one they begin to die
The bird flies right into the firer going for his eye
but a bullet catches it in mid-flight and explodes
it in half sending circuits everywhere
It lands a smoking heap and manages to send off one last beep
to HQ where signals are boosted nationwide
and a swarm of vegan matadors takes to the sky with vengeance in mind
with cameras whirring ready to capture animal killers taken down
on their way home after a mindless killing spree.

I am not a vegan but then again birds are not matadors usually! I started with a title word and the rest wrote itself really. Reminds me a bit of that scene in Indiana Jones when Sean Connery runs into a flight of birds with his umbrella sending them into the path of an oncoming Messerschmidt which is trying to kill Indy and his Dad who then says ‘”I suddenly remembered my Charlemagne. ‘Let my armies be the rocks and the trees and the birds in the sky’.” Beautiful.

Post-Going Missing, Pre-Coming Home

Is post going missing? By this, I do not mean through dawn raids on your letterbox or mail slot, although these things have been known to happen. I have heard (heard) that even if someone were to s…(muffled)

Anyway, this post is about ‘Post’. We are always Post-something. How many times have I switched on the radio or television or read somewhere that we are Post-Industrialist, Post-Feminism2 or 3 (I lose count), Post – War, Post-Colonialism, Post-Thatcher, and soon to be Post-Brexit Referendum 2016.

Things as they are, and by things I mean the kind of things that like plastic bird strangling variety found on the tops of four-packs-of-lager from your favourtie off license or soft drinks retailer have a nasty habit of sticking in your mind masqeurading as the truth. These things that shackle us to our feeble impressions of reality and whats right and wrong are often Post-something or another as we struggle with a new paralysing reality the talking heads and pens go on about how much better it was before when things were just how they were Pre-whatever cum wotsit…

The Wild West. The new frontiers are times of lawlessness and pioneering discovery. These are the Pre-days. Just stick those three letters before the name of any epoch you care to mention and what springs to mind. Activity, thought, danger, activity, effort, discussion, teamwork, ingenuity, heroism, breakthroughs and dissapointment resilience, determination, resourcefulness, fulfilment, lives worth the living, vision, actuality, reality pushing and smashing through boundaries in a flash of light of discovery, passion and new life. Otherwise known as War.

As the Digital Era develops and expands laterally, vertically and horizontally pushing out like the belly of an angry dragon what else shall be consumed by his fiery breath. The High Street singed, Recruitment singed, technology, singed, commerce singed, warfare changed, relationships changed, entertainment changed.Communication constantly evolving at breakneck speed. Who will the losers and the winners be?

One things is for sure. It’s not a good time to be illiterate or poor. And those who seek an audience with the pioneers had better come prepared for society on the move not in some slow-motion replay but in the seconds, it takes to transfer funds from one economy to another electronically updating records before you have time to blink. Instant communication with workforces, millions of people connected by intra-tech colloquially known as shared technology in the hands of a few trusted people accountable to themselves and their families, shareholders and boards. It’s tech at the top. How high can you stretch?

Back to the present and we see a day in which Pre-This and Post-That are but images that can be manipulated by not only governments but individuals keen to make their mark on society. Youtube videos and music production standards are up by one thousand percent since the early days of the service.


I still, like millions of others own a television, radio and a bookshelf. We may be Post-Internet Explosion but we are still very much Pre-Digital home.

Finally, what about the present? War with Russia? CyberWar with China and the developing world? IS in Syria and Turkey? IDK. I would sure as hell be well entertained, though, at the End Of The Pre and Post World. If It should happen it would probably be electronically and thus unnoticeable except to voltmeters which one day might develop intelligence and take over the world

I am kidding. I hold out hope for humanity under the age of 25 before they are exposed to responsibilities that make them POST-Fun, Post-Freedom Of Thought, Post-compassion and turn them all into Post eBay-Smart Phones.

You might get used to living in a world where your pound shop post it notes carry more weight than your £400.00 phone (and are easier to update) but until then hold on tight, trust no-one and keep on writing.

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What is its nature? We don’t know. It doesn’t think.

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Madness Resumes Control!

Control and its many variations. Such utter..ances… make my nose… bleed.

I would rather Jack than Fleetwood Mac, as the saying goes.

But still here marooned on an alien planet with only home delivery to keep my sane and in the ‘game’. I now have a subscription to Amazon Prime and I am in the process of purchasing a new computer for gaming and 3D but also have a subscription to Virgin Media for telly Broadband and Phone and Spotify for music and various computers and thinking of adding a third. Then there is my tablet and smartphone – none of which really speak to each other. Isn’t it time for a change? A joined up solution?

Your comments would be welcome so long as they are not trolly or smutty.

Here is a little wishlist to give you some ideas

  • To be able to play Assassins creed or something like it in HD with min 2.1 sound on min 21″ screen
  • To be able to load and run Open Source 3D software like Blender for personal graphics projects.
  • To be able to listen to Spotify with min 2.1. speaker setup
  • To be able to get on the internet for work/study/pleasure separately
  • To be able to watch, record rewind television on min 24-inch screen and 2.1 speakers
  • To be able to open/ save edit Microsoft office documents like Word
  • To be able to make and receive calls (preferably for free) both at home and outside
  • To be able to use Microsoft and Android, Linux OS and Apps
  • Wifi.
  • Separate systems for bedroom cum study cum living room.

I would like to use my existing hardware:

Toshiba 870 17″ Laptop

Samsung 24 ” Monitor (For set top box)

Nice 2.1 speakers (one lesser set also for tv)

Windows 7 PC with dual core processor and 20″ screen. 4GB RAM


I am thinking that a new 2nd User PC with quad-core processor, 8GB RAM Graphics card, speakers and some 2nd user screens for multi-screen apps.

That would do for everything game wise and 3D too.

There really isn’t much choice on offer for my budget and A Home PC rental with TV Phone Mobile is not available yet (from my research).

I can dual boot linux on this PC maybe even triple boot with android (Bluestacks) although this would mean I would need a touchscreen for all those android games!

Well that’s about it. Sanity is back in charge.

But for how long?