Akon or Lemcorn?

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Fresh Strawberry – An Obiturary

Mmm Tasty! One of his cousins maybe.

Fresh Strawberry, known to his friends and casual dinner partners as ‘that one’ or ‘the biggun’ was today eaten by Clarissa Storm aged 5 and three-quarters in Battersea North London.

When asked what it tasted like Clarissa stunned this reporter by saying ‘like lemons’ before screwing up her face like she was chewing on one.

Fresh Strawberry is survived by some radish, olive oil and a strange fruit resembling a hand grenade only found in Lidl.