The Clock Ticks






Happy New Year!

Bon Anniversaire!


Such things occur, as they are wont to do. No?

And the wind does change and a northerly blows past your window!

Succour for the masses gathered in their classes. Huh?

Not tonight my friend!

Tonight is Your Life!

BANG! You are dropped on your head and given a bed and swaddling clothes. These  are yours to shit and puke on! You are a baby my friend and your drive everybody around the bend, right around the bend!

BANG! You have a toddling pen and toys. You make a VERY LOUD NOISE! Congratulations You are a toddler! The terrible twos make way for the Really threes and the Fairly fours and now Five is knocking at your door and girls are paying attention to you. What to do. THROW A TANTRUM!

BANG! You are ten and life is academic. The apes descended from the trees and colonised the earth, reproduced and became men with briefcases and laptops and mobile phone. One day soon You pray for good results and at grammar school a PLAAACE!

BANG! An automobile accident and you lose your sister and a limb. life will never be the same again. Twelve is a difficult age enough without this LIMB THING!

BANG! You’re sixteen and its time to leave home. To boarding school, you will go along with your books and strange PECCADILLOS for frogs and other limb reproducing things. Along with your books goes an APPRECIATION for GOD and the OTHER which you discovered quite by accident while looking for a spanner to fix your WHEELCHAIR.

BANG! You’re seventeen and have long hair and you and a million others share the same taste in music. And in Girls, you meet your soulmate. You find a dinner date. You stamp your foot and she gives you that LOOK. You propose and get ENGAGED. Cummerbands are all the rage at WHITE WEDDINGS for you and your bride.

BANG! You’re eighteen and you lose a baby to a miscarriage of justice. The FIRST of MANY. You get a beard to go with your ponytail. Your missus starts wearing black. Your nickname is JACK of all trades. You get a job parking trolleys.

BANG! You are 21! You get a mortgage to go with your suicidal wife who blames herself. You get a promotion to SECURITY and spend your days deciding which SHOPLIFTERS to let go or PROSECUTE to the full extent of the LAW.

BANG! You have a kid aged 31 who plays the wilds in you like a devil and brings your wife down to earth and HEAVEN. At last, you can play at happy families at DO IT YOUR OWN WAY!

BANG! Your forty and divorced! You live in a bedsit in a shitty part of town. Your kind are not WANTED. Disabled and divorced… Your kid doesn’t want to know you…



You buy the rope and measure the drop. Two foot should be enough.




Go Do An Access Course At Another Institution

The mountain I left I have returned to and I see now how tall and wide it is.


I wouldn’t mind but It took some effort just to get back here to have a look and I am exhausted already.

Now As I survey my destination somewhere behind this mountain I wonder wouldn’t it be easy if I had a helicopter.

Not that my destination is clear. I know of several possible destinations all of which lie behind the mountain. If I make myself light I can whisk myself up into the air and float over to them. where I can see like icebergs their pointed tops. Not, however, the 7/8 that lie underneath.

Passing over the mountain would give me knowledge enough to get through and into another void.


When I just sit and write nothing new comes out. I end up in voids, cold voids.

My pass is expired. I used up my chances when I was free had some money and a job, a car a so called life.

Now I have all that I need to survive and not a jot more dough I am hungry again. But my chances were blown in attempts years ago. What can I do?

Buy a book? I think impossible to achieve the ends I seek. Write a book and learn heuristically. It’s what I do already.

I want teaching or tuition. If I wanted to evolve out of primordial ooze I wouldn’t have applied to be taught.

Distance education means being taught from a distance, over the phone or online. You can do lots of things online and over the phone. It’s pretty vague description. It just implies that you require a computer with an internet connection. and a telephone. Doesn’t tell you any more than that. except you are also told by the success of this method that this method works. Great. Where do I sign?

But you withdrew your registration of past courses. You failed to complete others. You were advised to go and study elsewhere first then to come back. well, maybe that’s what I’ll do. except I am disabled and cannot study elsewhere  at a normal institution!!! and it would also stop me from taking part in the only social activities that I do. The OU is my only option for quality tuition.