Internet connection on the blink again

I want to write something new

The urge is upon me lifting me up

by the shoulders, an impossible position in which to write.

But here I go.

How hot is something? We say temperature. We say skin.

Hot Hot Hot Hot!

What do they put in the water around here? We say spectral analysis. We say H2O

Oxygen, Oxygen, Oxygen, Oxygen.

Hydrogen, a major constituent (non voting) of the sun. Our sun. Warm and fuzzy. Well yes in the summertime when the air is right then in the winter cold even though the temperature has only dropped by a few degrees. 20 degrees or thirty or even forty is the range you are likely to experience your entire life. T hats what heaters are for. It never occurs to me until I have relaxed into some sort of scientific corner that if you could control the temperature of the planet you could feasibly control the entire world including the oceans and near space. Terrorist. How can you think such a thing? Be nice and leave people and their homoeostasis alone. An animals. Don’t forget the animals. They look after themselves. Unless they are domestic loved more than their human counterparts and SPOILED rotten. Well, I’m just jealous. It’s not fair. NOBODY RUNS AROUND CLEANING UP AFTER ME WIPING MY A*** PARDON THE EXPRESSION. Back to the scientific corner. I have my temperature results. I have my spectral analysis of a glass of water. Now I need to tabulate the results. Why? So I can do what every self respecting scientist has thought about at some time or another. I must publish. Word. Power point. Create space. The local telegraph pole. Telegraph? Shouldn’t that be broadband pole?? Internet pole?? Unless you are on cable then you access the underground internet. Describing words. Misunderstandings. War.

So what is the barrier to temperature and water analysis for the average person? What is the difference between men and women? What makes me taking the temperature of a pool happen?

And the spectral analysis of its water. And the physical, biological, chemical, spiritual, elemental, cultural, historical, futurist, shamanistic, musical and the weather properties of my pool of water?

I need this information to survive. Only joking. Its just interesting important and useful to know.

So what is my plan? Well I intend to stick a thermometer or other temperature probe into the water of the middle of my local reservoir. Second I intend to take a beaker of water and seal it and send it off for analysis to a laboratory I find on the internet that with any luck will feel mine is a position worthy of a hefty discount of the time required by their spectroscope or whatever equipment they use to tell me what is the mineral, biological and chemical constituents of my beaker of reservoir water.

Then the detective work will begin. Why are their mineral traces of some compound found in metamorphic rocks that seep water out of the ground of Northern Cumbria doing in my reservoir sample? I don’t know what I will find. Also why is there microscopic life usually found in rivers doing sitting in a man made reservoir? These and more questions will open new lines of enquiry into the habitat and ecology of my reservoir.

Health allowing. I see a few helpers in the future taking periodic samples so I can use their analysis to measure changes over time or say after a particularly heavy rainfall or cold snap or warm spell.

I have already thought of some other preliminary steps like establishing links with other limnologists, taxonomists, biologists, scientists, technicians in the area and getting what reading material I can from them to give me some thing to start with and save unnecessary duplication of research. It’s exciting wellies on time!

Well I hope you have enjoyed this little piece on my project which is slowly germinating in my mind. I have had fun writing this and will enjoy pressing ‘publish’ when it happens.

In the meantime have a very happy Christmas. Wishing peace and goodwill to all men.


Published by Andrew Mark Watkins

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