The voice from behind the wall has spoken and today it said ‘Liar’ This was after a long conversation during which I poured out some pretty ridiculous but meaningful reasons for me studying Latin Or latin without the capital L. Which does it deserve? I suppose it is a proper noun the name of a language so, in that case, it would be proper (get me) for its first letter to be capitalised. What does the accusation deserve (for those of you waiting) A rant with me throwing pint glasses full of Doom Beer at the wall then me falling to my knees all ‘a sob’ wailing ‘Wall forgive me for I have sinned! It’s been Toooooo loonng since my last confession?’ I blame misogyny in the courts, the COURRRRTS!

In other knews, I told my Dad today of my plans to study latin and to take the classical, philosophical, medical, mathematical, bones of the human body, Map A Mundi people by storm. his reaction? The clock is ticking son. Thanks Dad for that piece of crap wisdom. Next time I will just pull a cracker or open a fortune cookie. Free calls what can you do eh?

In the world of Latin, I learnt today. Veni Vidi Vici. which means I came I saw I conquered and was uttered by some Roman Emperor I recall after some victory. Which is fitting after all. isn’t one more day lived a victory in itself? Or is that too much wartime angst for you. I hesitate to say we are at war. It’s not like every time you go to London you have to dodge the suicide bombers and that sort of humour just plays into the hands of the bombers. Well, it is a sobering thought. I mean I wanted to go to London to the Hellenic Bookstore to have a browse and spend some of the governments money. Only joking. I have little interest in a bookshop! Only the books therein. Which is why I use amazon so I can get the books I need to be posted through my front door. Which is shared incidentally. I live in Ivory Tower Number 4(flat 4)

Declensions, Declensions, are no more apparently. Today we learn in an enlightened atmosphere of fun teaching and learning. I don’t know what I prefer. I have the most fun doing serious jokes but learn the most while being funny strange or just plain different. Which one rocks the most?

See I am perfectly fit for learning a difficult language like Latin. I can approach it strategically lest I ever am disappointed in my performance or even surprised at how well or badly I manage. All will be revealed.

In other knews, I renamed my savings account ‘Latin lessons’ early this morning. I am now ready to begin the transfer of funds whenever I have a spare fifty quid (or less). My desk is ready. I just need an extension cable for the compvter. Isn’t that like latin? I will add to the technology with time, for now, i have one monitor, one computer. In my head, i see three monitors two computers. The Matrix style.

A surge of melancholy. Ahhhh! That’s Radiohead playing in the background. Don’t leave me high. Its the best thing that you ever had…



Published by Andrew Mark Watkins

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