Every Time

I wish I were a poet and could sing about my life.

 

Even words cannot describe what happened then.

 

Remember that once you had friends and times that should not be forgotten.

The future was beckoning like a roaring lion.

And jackals and laughing hyenas ran too

In the streets of somewhere that in time did begin

A sequence of unrepeatable events,

that bring emotion to the fore or a tear to my eye and a heaviness to my chest.

We were better than the rest and obeyed no-ones rules

It’s was like cherries in oil in absinthe in Paris.

And to that life, I said goodbye.

But still in a moment, I can recall a little although

it was so long ago. A slideshow of rules broken

of times and of places and people long forgotten.

It was not five miles from here when I lay there with you in bliss.

But you had other things on your mind, all of the time.

Of whose making were you I wondered then

From where did you come and where were you going?

To Valhalla or Eden?  In the end, it was the night that took you

that left me behind in cold stark daylight. But I couldn’t see without

you and go blind mad and stupid again. I need glasses, did you know? but I don’t wear them anymore.

I take comfort from you. I bring the unnecessary. I bring the pain. Yet you come again and again and again. like a lion to water. You need me I think. How stupid could I have been? how blind, how vain? That you could possibly want me but not lay a verbal claim. What would you say? To going away for a day or two, somewhere virgin, somewhere new?

Star fire blue big-shot flew.

Now I visit home stores and see pillows that remind me of you.

In a kaleidoscope of imitations, I wander never blue like you.

Never true.

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