Fish Are Amazing!

Well it’s coming up on nine o clock pm (well it is) and I’m looking at writing another brilliant masterpiece. Well I am. I just woke up (again). For those of you who don’t regularly read this blog I have un-diagnosed CFS (Chronic Fatigue Syndrome) which invariably means I am either on the verge of waking or sleeping, not excluding dozing, lying down or practicing my old favourite ‘the snooze’. So now, after much shut eye I have a token amount of energy that I intend to expend on the noble art of prose construction or for those of you who prefer your prose simple, I intend to do some writing.

Now writing is … if I could say what writing is I would no longer have to write, nor would anyone I guess. But Ill have a go. Writing is words on a page or on a sign or on a computer. Writing is sentences of those words arranged in forms E.g. paragraphs. Words can be long short, nouns, verbs, adjectives (describing words) and are laid out according to grammar. Grammar is CAPITAL LETTERS, commas, full stops, verb endings etc.  You learn most of this at school. School work on words is greatly aided by reading books. Personally speaking, rather than relying on this blog for grammar you’d be more ably informed on things like grammar by reading a grammar book or getting grammar lessons from a tutor. Warning: grammar has been known to bring about sleep in its strictest adherents not unlike CFS (see first paragraph). Well that sums up grammar. Writing can be prose (like this blog) poetry (like a Haiku) Technical (like the instructions that came – or were missing- from your tablet). But I am barely scratching the surface of the deep blue ocean that is words. There are some things that you might like if you like words. Dictionary – These books tell you what words mean and contain thousands of new words for you to learn (if you are into that) Thesaurus – This book tells you many different words categorised under words that all mean roughly the same thing. So if you are looking for a word that means the same as smelly you can look it up (or make one up – odourish for example fits smelly like a week long worn bed sock fits my foot on a cold winters night – but I digress) Fiction/Faction/Non-Fiction books. The list is Endless. Wikipedia is a good source of information. Wikipedia Pause. A good place to begin might be with ‘Alphabet’ and you might finish with ‘Novel’ and ‘legal writing’. Har!

Well all that teaching has left me thinking I have perhaps overdone it a bit so I will now make way for something more fantastical and light hearted. Fish. Fish are in fact very funny, fantastical creatures. I mean they breathe water via their gills and literally extract the oxygen from the water with Organic Chemical Engineering. Amazing! Hydrolysis it isn’t but I wanted to say hydrolysis because I like saying hydrolysis. Hydrolysis, hydrolysis! Also fish have no arms or legs but swim by shimmying their body. Shimmy, shimmy, shimmy! And they have eyes on both sides of their heads. So I imagine what they see is like two lcd televisions one for the left side and one for the right. Which reminds me that The Voice is now over! No more Tom, Ricky, Rita or Will for another twelve months. Sigh!

Well that’s it for another instalment. Stay tuned and get a good night sleep! Sianara.

Published by Andrew Mark Watkins

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